I used my powers of procrastination and ad hoc justification to help others! I convinced two very stressed developers that it wasn't worth wasting time finding out which clients would be inconvenienced by their latest change. Simpler by far to build an automatic check into the upgrade, and have it tell the customers to tell us if there was a problem. They visibly relaxed as I improvised plausible reasons why this was the soundest approach, and as they departed, one sighed, "My headache's gone away now." If there's a difference between laziness and efficiency, I don't care.
Health and safety officer
My boss: "I'm exhausted. I wish I hadn't agreed to go out tonight. Oh well, I should enjoy myself, I suppose. I might get hit by a bus tomorrow."
Me: "Especially if you're tired from going out tonight."
If there's one thing better than solving someone's problems in short order, it's solving someone's problems in short order and then being entitled to gloat about it openly in front of them.
If you can suggest any other roles I might usefully adopt to improve my career prospects or job satisfaction, I'm open to suggestions.