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In my defense...

... it's not wickedness that makes me say those things to the cats, but love. It's natural to anthropomorphise your pets, projecting rather more human, and dare I say nuanced, personalities onto their actions. My words just enhance that process. After all, Cassidy typically looks imperious and perhaps somewhat disdainful when she sprawls on the bed watching me through half-shut eyes, so if I call her affectionate but somewhat derogatory nick-names - thereby deserving that sort of look - I'm deepening our bond, really. Similarly, as Charlie's wide-eyed kitten features give her an air of permanent confusion, it's only appropriate for me to tell her that there are ghost mice under the bed, or just to dance in front of her until she runs away or flops to the floor.

Also, I'm pretty sure that when Cassidy is miaouing in the kitchen, it's OK for me to complement her on her singing and, unsolicited, to present her with some food and a round of applause as a token of my appreciation, as long as it doesn't actually slow down the food-bowl-filling process. And finally, when I find a cat lying neatly with her legs tucked under her, I maintain that it is harmless to:
a) pretend that her legs have fallen off, possibly from too much scampering, and/or
b) become The Kitten Messiah and cause them to miraculously grow back by laying on of hands.

None of these habits are naughty, right?

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( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
stavner
Nov. 28th, 2011 11:09 pm (UTC)
Well, cats don't understand words anyway, so as long as you use a pleasant tone of voice, they'll be okay.
tinyjo
Nov. 28th, 2011 11:11 pm (UTC)
Charlie is only little and so anything that makes her more confused is naughty! Also you should be properly respectful of Cassie. She only gives you that look because she knows what you're thinking :-)
vinaigrettegirl
Nov. 29th, 2011 12:52 pm (UTC)
My brother the animal (especially cat) wizard addresses his cats as "meatloaf, with ketchup", and so on; he regularly tickles their tummies or feet, and not only do they adore him, he takes them for walks, they curl up on his shoulder, they know their names, and in general act like a high-functioning family, with threatened Viking invasions. You are nowhere near naughty.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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