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Things I wish I'd known

Just a quick post today (i.e. one hour of writing and tinkering rather than three), because I'm giving a talk on 'Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse' to my favourite old university society: OUSFG. I'd post the text that, but
a) I don't want to spoil it for anyone catching up on their friends page before coming to see me, and
b) I haven't actually planned much of it yet.
Maybe I'll put something together for later in the week.

Anyway, today's post was inspired by a slot they have on Saturday Live called 'The thing I wish I'd known'. As with the rest of the show, I only listen because we use it as an alarm clock and it veers wildly from week to week between humour and pathos, but it did get me thinking:

  • Dairy products give me spots
    Now this is something I wish I'd known during the years I spent basically living on cheese sandwiches and muesli. In fact I only figured it out it a couple of years ago, when we went on holiday to France. I was (of course) eating lots of delicious cheese for almost every meal, and my acne got incredibly bad. I put two and two together and tried cutting dairy stuff out, and the results were obvious almost immediately. Though I've not done thorough testing, sheep's milk stuff seems bad too, but goat-based things seem fine. My limited research suggests that this is definitely a contentious topic, though as readers of Milk, Sulphate and Alby Starvation know, the Milk Marketing Board has got a lot of clout. If any of my highly educated readers can suggest exactly what it is that I'm reacting to, that would be dead handy, especially if it helps me to discover more cheeses that I can eat...


  • Shopping for clothes is much more interesting if you go to the women's section
    Compare and contrast, for example, Next mens' section (racks and racks of functionally indistinguishable trousers, in a choice of blue, grey or brown) and the womens' section (natty patterns (pin-stripe jeans!), crazy colours (shiny disco trousers!) and interesting cuts (boot-cut! hipsters!)). I actually find myself wanting to go clothes shopping now, and that never happened before I discovered this secret. You have to be the right shape, of course, but a common complaint from the women of my acquaintance is that women's trousers seem to be designed for short, skinny people with no hips, so I'm sorted. And sure, there's not always very much room for the... luggage, if you know what I mean, but if you persevere it is possible to find women's trousers with decent pockets. It can also be difficult to find ones that fit around the groin, but on the other hand it's quite flattering to have to go up a size because your cock's too big.
So, anything you wish you'd known?

Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
monkeyhands
Nov. 12th, 2008 07:58 pm (UTC)
1. The bit on your Switch card which says "Card Number" isn't the card number. The card number is the big number written across the middle.

2. The stuff about adding four or five inches to your ribcage measurement in order to get your bra band size is rubbish and the reason why so many women are wearing the wrong size bra.

3. When you argue to prove a point and make the other person feel wrong, you're less likely to get them to see your own point of view than if you treat them with respect.
monkeyhands
Nov. 12th, 2008 08:02 pm (UTC)
4. I'm dyspraxic, not stupid or spoilt or hopeless.

5. Network railcards can save you loads of cash if you're too old for a young person's railcard and not yet pensionable.
celestialweasel
Nov. 12th, 2008 09:25 pm (UTC)
I once managed to find a pair of women's jeans that fitted me quite well, I cannot remember the luggage issue, I have a dim recollection of a slightly unfortunate parting of the ways. Can't remember where I got them from. What I don't understand is why it is so sodding hard to get 32'' waist 36'' leg jeans. On my last attempt (in Reading) there were jeans of something like 46'' waist 32'' leg. These days wandering round Oxford there seem to be plenty of tall, skinny men.
satyrica
Nov. 12th, 2008 11:57 pm (UTC)
Yay Alby Starvation! Now you've gone and made me order stuff . . .
applez
Nov. 13th, 2008 01:42 am (UTC)
Open to suggestions? Thinking a step further past World War Z? Bifurcate your survival strategies depending on the nature of the zombie apocalypse?
sparkymark
Nov. 13th, 2008 01:56 am (UTC)
Mini Cash ISAs were £3000 a year, not £3000 total.

Bio washing Powder is bad for eczema.

Not being in a relationship is better than 40%-60% of the relationships you could be in.
celestialweasel
Nov. 13th, 2008 10:44 am (UTC)
In the spirit of your first point, for some reason it took me ages to work out that the headaches, nausea and flashing lights I was getting at the same time were in fact, drum role, migraines!
Not that this made any material difference since the magic tablets don't really work any better for me than the parrots I was taking anyway.
cleanskies
Nov. 13th, 2008 11:26 am (UTC)
Try ibuprofen lysine. It's stupidly expensive if you buy the various neurofen permutations, but sainsburys do an own-brand.
cleanskies
Nov. 13th, 2008 11:28 am (UTC)
One piece of knowledge that would have saved me a bit of hair-tearing this week is that "wedding breakfast" in fact means the evening meal you have after your wedding. FFS.
jinty
Nov. 13th, 2008 11:40 am (UTC)
(clothes shopping) On the other hand, at least cargo pants seem to be coming back in, after a long drought.

I like looking in the men's section, because it's not pink and frilly. Not that all the women's section is, but by god there's some spectacularly ugly stuff out there at any one time. You wonder if they do it on purpose, sometimes. The men's section has some natty shirts and spiffy knitwear, but I suspect that we are approaching from different ends of the taste spectrum in certain shopping aspects.
oxfordhacker
Nov. 13th, 2008 11:49 am (UTC)
I suspect that we are approaching from different ends of the taste spectrum in certain shopping aspects.

Maybe we should swap outliers...
vinaigrettegirl
Nov. 13th, 2008 02:08 pm (UTC)
Dairy allergy/reactivity ....

Lactose intolerance is a possibility. A protein intolerance is another.

It is also suggested that the hormone, DHT, is present in milks from animals on short pregnancy cycles.

You could test the differences between soy and non-soy milk; and organic and non-organic milk. Organic herds tend to have longer lactation cycles. You could try the Lacto-free brand of milk and yoghurt to see if they have an effect on your skin; if you don't react then it's likely to be that you are lactose-intolerant. You might also check out pasteurised and non-pasteurised cheeses.

If you are lactose intolerant then your cheese love affair may have to become a topic for lieder, which, as we know, are all about Love and Death. If it's hormones, then good sourcing for your milk may help. It would be a good excuse to canvass all kinds of cheese-makers as well, to see if they milk pregnant animals or give them a chance to dry off before breeding them again.
tea_and_cuddles
Nov. 14th, 2008 01:48 am (UTC)
Goat's cheese is getting quite diverse nowadays; no longer is it all tangy creamy cheese that you might not like. It's worth trying the new varieties both in supermarkets and posh farmers markets.

I've known a few people who avoid cow dairy products but are happy with goats and maybe sheep.

The most commonly mentioned symptom of eating diary I've heard is increased mucous in the head/throat area.
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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