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  • Fri, 15:05: RT @PaulMMCooper: Medieval depiction of Twitter by Hieronymus Bosch https://t.co/rLVgHC0KjZ
  • Fri, 15:07: RT @NicSampson: “So your new carol is just eight verses of you demanding figgy pudding with increasing hostility.” “That’s right.” “And i…
  • Fri, 15:08: RT @DrVikkiBurns: Oh @Tesco you are actually frickin' kidding, right? Auntie teaches shopping and Uncle teaches all things geek?????? HOW…
  • Fri, 15:09: RT @JamesBSumner: Too many joys to mention here, but I particularly loved - driverless cars also passengerless - full-immersion VR headset…
  • Fri, 15:10: RT @JanelleCShane: I trained a neural network to write Christmas carols and it got confused. In retrospect I should have seen this coming.…
  • Fri, 15:28: RT @19acres: This is just to say I have taken the figgy pudding that was in the icebox and which you were probably saving for Christmas…
  • Fri, 15:28: RT @arrroberts: "Marley was Dredd, to begin with. 'I AM THE LAW' he bellowed, gunning down carol singers with his Lawgiver and sending Tiny…
  • Fri, 15:28: RT @_F_B_G_: When ur actually a red squirrel but u need a pseudonym to pursue a moderately successful career in the Church of England: http…
  • Fri, 15:31: RT @ReformedBroker: This is how we did machine learning in my day. https://t.co/bBQqFTfZzM
  • Fri, 15:32: RT @DrDaveH: Government to reintroduce popular "iconic" ration books in major Brexit victory https://t.co/MR2DLomXyX
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  • Sun, 14:23: RT @rachelle_mandik: {first date} him: i like a woman who knows when to break the rules me: *breaks the second law of thermodynamics and de…
  • Sun, 20:24: RT @_Enanem_: Last Xmas my parents got me a pair of flip flops with matchbox cars glued to the bottom… bloody cheapskates.
  • Sun, 21:04: RT @Arr: Everyone should read this terrifying article about how sick our society has become and how alienated we are we are from our humani…
  • Mon, 10:45: RT @_F_B_G_: Christmas is a time of year where normal standards of aesthetics go out the window. I'm very pleased to report that England's…
  • Mon, 10:58: RT @meakoopa: sometimes i read a tweet and am like "what the fuck is the punchline here" and get mad but then realize it has like two faves…
  • Mon, 11:06: RT @AndrewChamings: In an alternate universe there is only one movie about falling in love, but thousands about swapping faces with John Tr…
  • Mon, 11:39: RT @unormal: My wife started laughing and showed me this metaphor. I don't think this means what you think it means ms bradley. https://t.c…

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My tweets

  • Fri, 12:42: RT @Brainmage: Either I work with someone with an orgasm denial fetish, or a randy, wealthy lady from the Middle Ages. https://t.co/tfY22xF
  • Fri, 16:23: RT @gideondefoe: Moleskin should release a really overpriced napkin for the true creative spirit
  • Fri, 16:24: RT @_Enanem_: I once had a girl, or should I say, she once had me... ~ Oedipus.
  • Fri, 16:27: RT @philippawarr: This is also part of the ongoing saga where Google's Bridget Jones algorithms try to figure out why I don't have a baby y…
  • Fri, 16:27: RT @philippawarr: It's gone from ads for pregnancy tests to ads for ovulation kits to ads for dating sites and now is flailing wildly for s…
  • Fri, 16:27: RT @philippawarr: At some point it's going to throw up its little digital hands and say "I GIVE UP just advertise her some cats and a funer…
  • Fri, 16:33: RT @j4: Img: "Why do people kiss under mistletoe?" Me: "I don't know, darling." Img: "Kissing under a plant! What is the world coming to?!"
  • Fri, 18:18: RT @permutans: "no you hang up" https://t.co/MTUatgFt9p
  • Fri, 21:18: RT @schroduck: I'm tired of dodging serial killers on my morning commute so I'm very excited for Musk's safer alternative *checks notes* pr…
  • Fri, 22:42: RT @DVSblast: bitcoin will REVOLUTIONIZE how the economy works. for example, in 3 years, you will die from not having enough BITCOIN for me…

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  • Thu, 14:22: RT @griffinkate: There's a guy doing the rounds of this street with a device to clean fascias and gutterings. It *doesn't* have THIS MACHIN…
  • Thu, 15:55: This is both hilarious and thought-provoking https://t.co/RfUV4IgaW5
  • Thu, 16:42: Fun morning game of Name That Tune vs, @j4, using @NME's 'Singles Of The Week 1993' I was first to identify Arreste… https://t.co/v6kki48xTs
  • Thu, 16:42: RT @hellothisisivan: Contemplating Lady Penelope reading a magazine with an actual human woman on the cover may be what finally drives me i…
  • Thu, 17:14: RT @Annjj: Asked 20 if she’d make a nice festive gin and tonic. This is the result. She’s my eldest of three absolute dickheads. https://t…
  • Thu, 22:30: RT @MartinBelam: This is one of the most astonishing narrative arcs I've ever written about https://t.co/jrfjNaUxfi
  • Thu, 22:31: RT @adam_chal: Bitcoin was supposed to demonstrate the power of a true free market. Instead it's full of scams, rent-seekers, theft, useles…
  • Thu, 23:40: RT @Milo_Edwards: *committee hearing* chair: mr davis, have you done any research on brexit at all? davis: yes *opens spark notes under tab…
  • Fri, 08:16: RT @rynbtmn: This post on how to fix twitter by @kevboh is: 1) A great idea 2) Wonderfully written - a fun but considered explanation of a…
  • Fri, 08:23: RT @HMittelmark: Wait a minute! If consciousness is just an epiphenomenon of the brain, trapped inside a radically unreliable sensorium...t…
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  • Fri, 22:03: RT @lisaxy424: 1997 middle school me learning about Rome: But how could such a developed and rich society collapse so suddenly? 2017 me: oh
  • Fri, 23:58: RT @esaxey: I met a traveler from your kitchen and He said: Two vast and fleshless stones of plum Lie in the icebox. Sorry. Breakfast. Swee…
  • Fri, 23:58: RT @ScottWesterfeld: Hey, guys. I just re-read the rules to America, and we've been playing it wrong. You're supposed to draw from the Rand…
  • Fri, 23:58: RT @j4: They eat your plums, your mum & dad, They may not mean to, but they do. They raid your icebox, leave a note: No sweet delicious plu…
  • Sat, 09:07: RT @aedwardslevy: now I lay my poll to field I pray the breaking news to yield if while it's fielding news should break i pray my poll sti…
  • Sat, 09:07: RT @tomwhoscontrary: For sale: icebox. No plums.
  • Sat, 09:12: RT @tomwhoscontrary: Amazingly spot-on thread. Turns out of you're unbelievably evil, people don't believe you're evil. https://t.co/J47kH8
  • Sat, 09:23: RT @BrandyLJensen: imagine thinking ppl secretly agree with you but are afraid to admit it on twitter, the website where we're like "jeff g…
  • Sat, 09:24: RT @logicbutton: And I find it kinda funny I find it kinda sad That your breakfast for tomorrow Was the plums that I just had
  • Sat, 09:41: RT @KillerMartinis: I am now owed fucks. I ran out of them in like August 2016 and then I ran out of my performative ones and now people be…
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My tweets

  • Sun, 22:26: RT @mznewman: Could not have predicted 20 years ago that browsing in a bookstore in 2017, I’d see a vinyl LP soundtrack to a TV show about…
  • Sun, 22:43: RT @alvaroga91: 140: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 280: \\  \ \ (ツ)   \ < ⌒ヽ    /   へ \    /  /  \ \    レ ノ    ヽ_つ   / /   / /|  ( (ヽ  | | 、\  | 丿 \…
  • Sun, 22:43: RT @SoVeryBritish: “We could go for a walk” - Translation: We could walk to the pub
  • Mon, 08:58: RT @catupiry: Gatos n�o sabem quando est�o incomodando https://t.co/5dM2rWqh02
  • Mon, 09:02: RT @TwopTwips: FOOL people into thinking you're a small child by taking 45 minutes to put your shoes on for no discernible reason. (via @ga
  • Mon, 11:59: RT @HelloJessicaFox: Dreamed I got a huge pet crab and I glued jiggly eyes on his shell. Twitter is my dream journal now. Unfollow immediat…

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Cute overload
oxfordhacker
Drifting in and out of consciousness

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